October 18, 2008
Filed under Army of Song

Toys by XTC

Written by Nic | Contact this author


  

XTC is a band that can stretch one metaphor through an entire song without breaking it. A metaphor in their care will carefully expand and mature, as if they hold some secret patent on a kind of magical metaphor yeast. Here they explore the hidden worlds of children at play and uncover some brilliant gems, discovering that Toys are only human after all.

Lets see what the kids are up to.

The rag doll gets beaten up by the Action Man
The one with the real life hair
He walks and he talks in a commanding voice
But sexually he’s not all there

Through the insulating properties of metaphor and a good tune, this seems almost cute when you hear it. The toy violence sounds as simple and harmless as cartoon violence, and there’s a joke: G.I. Joe hasn’t got any junk.

But soon the subtext comes into focus. In their young lives the children at play have witnessed a man hitting a woman, for the reason that he’s an impotent bastard, and now the kids are reenacting the scene modeled for them.

Then things get serious.

The smell of smoke hanging thick over Funland
As the older toys are pushed down a ramp
The microchip master race are melting them down
In a dolly concentration camp

The world’s gone mad
But in miniature
The kids can only do what they feel
See them copy what their parents have done
Till they’re old enough to do it for real

So there it is parents: those unholy things your kids are doing, they learned by watching you! So please, XTC and I insist, be the person you want your kids to be. And if you ever see them playing a game that resembles the Holocaust, get your child and yourself to a professional right away.

XTC - Mummer - Toys


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